When "Clingy" Becomes an Anxiety Disorder
It can feel lovely to spend countless hours with a partner. In fact, for some people, spending every moment with their partner signals the strength of their connection. But for others, it can be a sign of anxious attachment.
Anxious attachment is a form of attachment disorder characterized by anxiety and insecurity. People with anxious attachment often feel the need to be close to their partner and fear abandonment constantly. If you get clingy or panicky when your partner goes out without you, you might suffer from anxious attachment.
What Causes Anxious Attachment?
There's no single cause of anxious attachment. Instead, it's thought to be the result of a combination of nature (genetics) and nurture (our upbringing). Additionally, family dynamics play a big role in shaping our attachment styles. For example, if we didn't have much stability growing up—if our parents were always fighting or we moved around a lot—we might develop an insecure attachment style. The "insecurity" comes from a lack of consistent and stable emotional support.
People with an insecure attachment style often have difficulty trusting others and may feel like they're not worthy of love and affection. As a result, they might cling to their partners to find the stability and security they didn't have growing up.
How To Talk About Anxious Attachment With Your Partner
If you think you have an anxious attachment style in relationships, you must talk to your partner about it. I hate to break it to you, but your partner can't read your mind. So they'll only know what you're feeling if you tell them. It might seem scary initially, but remember that your partner loves you and wants to help you feel better. Here are a few tips for how to start the conversation:
Be direct. The best way to get your point across is to say, "I think I have an anxious attachment."
Explain what anxious attachment is. Once you've said the words, please take a deep breath and explain what nervous attachment disorder is and how it affects you. This will help your partner understand what you're going through.
Talk about your childhood. It can be helpful to share stories from your childhood that might have contributed to your anxious attachment disorder. This will give your partner some insight into where your fears are coming from.
Tell them how you feel. Be honest about how your disorder makes you feel—lonely, scared, etc.—and why those feelings are hard for you to cope with. Talking about how you feel will help your partner empathize with you and want to help you through this difficult time.
Ask for their support. Finally, ask your partner for their support in overcoming your anxiety disorder. This might mean asking them to be understanding when you need some space or being patient when you have a panic attack. Whatever it is, let them know what would help make things easier for you.
Anxiety disorders can be tough–not only for yourself but also for your relationships since dealing with symptoms can stress even the strongest partnerships.. If you think that you or your partner may suffer from anxious attachments, don't hesitate to reach out for help from professionals or loved ones to begin working through this difficult topic together.. open dialogue is key in developing trust and intimacy within any relationship!
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